I’d hang this over my mantel, if I had a mantel.
I love you, tumblr. Never change.
eta: lol this isn’t mine and I DON’T KNOW THE SOURCE SO YEAH
Reblog if you think this should be the official mascot of the Michele Bachmann presidential campaign.
All the cools kids wear corduroy blazers and play with fire.
YOU’RE COMING AT ME WITH AN OWL? ARE YOU X%X$#ING SERIOUS?
Listen, kid. Get out of here before you hurt yourself. You’re &$%#ing with a real wizard, now, and I don’t want to have to deal with you.
“Hey old man, I beat Voldemort. And I died just to be able to do it.”
Volde what? Son I fought a Balrog for 10 days and died JUST SO I COULD HELP MY BUDDIES ON THEIR WALK. I’ve been alive for OVER TWO THOUSAND YEARS. What are you, 16?
“So? A Balrog’s not an evil wizard.”
No, it’s a friggin’ HELLFIRE DEMON. And if all we’re talking is wizards we’ve punked then I’ll put Sarumon up against that noseless weirdo you had such a hard time with.
“Sarumon was just a pawn! Just some guy following orders from a head honcho that you had to let some hobbits take care of!”
You SEE this?! This is Narya! You know what that is?! It’s one of the THREE ELVEN RINGS, punk!
“Well I have an Invisibility Cloak!”
Pssh. I had a ring that did the same thing. Know what I did with it?
“What?”
I GAVE IT TO A HOBBIT TO THROW INTO A VOLCANO. I’M GANDALF, BI*TCH!